(no subject)

[littleorphanalien]

Alex isn't home.

He's not at the shop, he's not at home, and there's no text on his phone that tells him where he is, and he's supposed to be at home for dinner. To say that Michael is freaking out is an understatement, but he is. His brain has jumped to the worst case scenarios, and he's freaking out about how Alex could just be gone.

Shit, shit, fuck.

The engagement ring is still sitting in the sock drawer. If something happened to Alex, or he vanished, then Michael never even had a chance to promise himself to him like that. He's panicking so badly, calling everyone they know until someone suggests that he tracks Alex's phone, but he's a genius in other walks of life, not this, and even when he searches how to do it, it doesn't work because that means Alex's phone needs to be on.

So he's going crazy sitting with Bopp, keeping her in his lap and trying to convince himself it's just Alex losing track of time, that's all.

Comments

[unendurable]

It's less that Alex lost track of time and more that he hasn't been in a position to make a call or help. He's been pushing himself between physical therapy and Bopp and work and his album and the house and trying to do all that he can. He's spent weeks ignoring the pain in his leg, the tiredness he feels that is bone deep and more than lack of sleep.

He was heading home from the studio when his leg suddenly as the kind of searing pain he remembers when he woke up in the hospital. Weakness shot through the limb and when he fell, he struck his head, losing consciousness.

When he came to he's in a hospital, hooked up to an IV, with a nurse coming to help him and explain what happened, to ask some questions and Alex only has one.

Where is Michael?

There's a lot of confusion and looking for his phone which is found in his things. It's explained there was no contact in his phone. No ICE number, and so they hadn't known who to contact.

He demands his phone, they offer to make the call, and it's a fight that leads to them sedating Alex for his own good, they said, and using his phone to dial a number for the only Michael in his phone.

The nurse waits for someone to answer.

[littleorphanalien]

Michael hears his phone ring and bolt for it, grabbing it on the first ring. "Hello?" he demands, trying not to shove Bopp out of the way. He doesn't actually recognize the phone number, which means it could be anyone, but then a nurse tells him that they have an Alex Manes at the hospital, as a patient.

Michael's on his feet, grabbing his denim jacket, vowing that he'll be there in minutes. "Just tell me where you are," he demands, locking up with his brain, shoving his keys into his car pocket before speeding off for the hospital, demanding to know what's happened.

The nurse is very polite, but then she says they sedated Alex and Michael growls, physically growls, and hangs up, speeding even faster to get to the hospital, charging right past the front door to demand to know where Alex is. They hold him back, which is why it's a good thing Michael grabbed the ring. He has no intention to actually show it to Alex, but he's willing to lie. "He's my goddamn fiance," he hisses, until the nurse looks guilty enough and lets him past.

Shoving it back in his pocket, he heads to the room, making a noise of alarm when he sees Alex, unconscious. "What did you do to him?"

[unendurable]

"He was fairly aggressive when he asked for his pone. He's had a mild head injury and we're not sure why he passed out. The doctor worried he would hurt himself or others, and so they asked for him to be sedate. It was a low dose and he shouldn't be out for long but by then we should have the test results and know how he's doing."

She gives Michael a sharp look. "As family, you're welcome to stay but we'll need you to stay calm and try and relax. We're sorry it took so long to contact you but he didn't have any emergency contact in his phone, at least not anyone with an active phone here in Darrow," she says, giving Michael a look. "Besides the prosthetic, does he have any medical condition we should be aware of? Does he take opiates for his pain?"

[littleorphanalien]

Michael's nostrils flare with rage as he pushes into the room, sliding into the seat beside Alex and taking his hand. "You fucking sedated him without his permission?" he seethes, and wonders if he can find a lawyer friend to help him sue the whole fucking hospital.

He's so angry that he hasn't stopped to think about the fact that he's in a hospital, the one place he vowed never to be, but it's for Alex. "I'll stay calm when you fucking give me a reason to!" he shouts, voice escalating until he glances to Alex and remembers to calm down. "He's got my number, from our last home," is his aggressive reply. "And I'm not getting into any personal details about his mental state, but physically, I..."

He doesn't know.

He doesn't know if Alex sneaks into the bathroom to drug up, and Michael tries not to look hurt when he says, "I don't know about the opiates. I don't think so."

[unendurable]

"He was aggressive, and has head trauma. Trust me, it was for his own good," she says, not at all bothered about Michael's anger. She's seen worse, and dealt with angrier. He's worried, and she's helping. Eventually he'll get over it, and realize they were helping his fiance.

"I only ask about his physical condition because what someone says he swayed, lost his balance and struck his head. He shows scarring that says he's had the prosthetic for some time so we worry that the fall was less about his leg and possibly for another reason. It's the only reason we ask," she says, coming over to face Michael when he seems to realize he doesn't know.

"We don't see reasons for it, and then we have to wonder if that is in part because of any medication. If it helps," she says softly, I'm not seeing signs of usage, but that means it may well have been because of pain, pushing himself too hard," she says, trying to offer Michael answers to keep him calm.

[littleorphanalien]

Michael isn't so sure, but he calms himself before percussive telekinetic energy washes through the room and takes her away with it, because that will get him in trouble. "What do you mean, he swayed?" he demands, his voice raw. "What, is there, is there something wrong with him? Is he sick?" he asks, his voice sounding small and scared.

What the hell is going on? How come the hospital didn't call him, how come he never noticed that Alex wasn't okay?

"He doesn't drug himself," Michael insists, this time sounding a whole lot surer. "He wouldn't," is a sharp, growl, drifting to Alex's side to take his hand with his mangled one. "Unless you're gonna be useful, please get the hell out."

[unendurable]

"All we have is a witness statement to the EMTs that brought him in," she says, shrugging slightly. "Why we were concerned. The doctor has run some preliminary tests so he should be in shortly with some more news," she says, smiling tightly as she leaves.

For a moment there's only the sound of the machines, and then a soft, croaking sound and then Alex speaks softly, not even opening his eyes. "My family huh? Please tell me you didn't say you were my brother," he manages, throat dry and it is heard in his voice. "Otherwise so many things I want with you seems so wrong."

[littleorphanalien]

Michael grips at Alex's hand, holding onto him as tightly as he can, freaking the fuck out, and hating the thought of doctors who aren't Valenti and hospitals and tests, but at least he knows that Alex is here, and he's alive, and he hasn't disappeared.

He's here.

When he hears Alex's voice, he lets out a ragged, hoarse laugh and lifts his hand to his lips, pressing a kiss there. "Don't worry, I don't have your great ass," he jokes, trying to keep things light. "I told them I was your fiance," he says, quietly, "so they'd let me in. They said there was no contact in case of emergency," he admits, voice subdued and pained. "I didn't know...I didn't realize we had to do that."

[unendurable]

His lips curl into a small smile, amused at what Michael has done. His fingers squeeze Michael's tightly.

"My fiance, huh? I feel cheated out of a proposal," he murmurs, tugging on Michael's hand to try and bring him closer.

"I should have thought about it," he murmurs. "And tell them I'm fine. I just got dizzy. I hadn't gotten around to lunch yet and was trying to get some things done before I had to take Bopp out. God, is she okay? Are you okay?"

Still feeling the sedative, but awake enough to talk with Michael even if his eyes are still closed.

[littleorphanalien]

Michael's glad that Alex's eyes aren't open, because his expression is wracked with pain and worry, drifting in with him until he's practically got his cheek pressed to the bed beside Alex, freaking out. "Yeah, well, who says it's not something I'm planning, huh?" he jokes, his voice rough. "Besides, they let me in, didn't they, so it worked."

He's not okay, but, "Bopp's fine. I went home and let her out, fed her, but you weren't there. I thought you had vanished or something had happened to you, and it wasn't until they called me, and..." He's losing his mind, if he's honest, a little still.

"They sedated you, Alex. They never even called me to ask."

[unendurable]

"Yeah well, when the time comes, I want a real proposal," he says, smiling slightly. "Don't just tell me like you told them."

The machine monitoring his heart rate speeds up a bit, and Alex can hear that and wants to wince realizing what he's said, the things they're talking about. It's crazy to talk about this, and he knows they need to not worry about that. Not right now.

"I hadn't thought about it here," he says slowly. "With the people that leave, we need to have a system. And I'm setting up our phones with emergency contacts." He sighs, blinking his eyes open finally to look up at Michael.

"It's my fault, and I'm sorry. I was getting my tattoo done, and I didn't want you to know until it was done so... I was sneaking around, and skipping lunch to do it." And maybe breakfast because he just hadn't thought he needed it.

"And for the record? I haven't taken opiates since I came back to Roswell. Or anything really for the pain. I have a prescription but I refused to take it. And I definitely don't have one here."

[littleorphanalien]

Michael keeps stroking his thumb in circles on Alex's hand, because yeah. Yeah, he knows he has to do better than just announcing it, and the look on his face softens even if Alex is still keeping his eyes closed. "Don't worry. When it's time and you and I are ready to take that step for real, it's gonna be good," he says, as an engagement ring burns a hole in his pocket.

He hadn't thought about any of it either, smiling fondly when Alex opens his eyes, even though Michael's still curled in with him. He's trying to forget that he's in a hospital, because if he stops to think about it, it'll scare the shit out of him.

"I'm glad to know you're not secretly popping pills in the bathroom to cope with me," he quips. "I know I can be a bit much, but that's kind of going overboard, isn't it?"

[unendurable]

"Mmkay," he groans softly, shifting to curl in closer to Michael, wanting to press into him and just hold him tight. "Holding you to that," he murmurs, even if his heart is kind of thumping hard in his chest, imagining that.

"Hush. Don't even. It was about my arm. You should look, even if we don't have a black light here I bet." At least he doesn't think they would.

He wriggles a bit to try and draw up the sleeve on his henley to sow Michael were he's added a full arm piece with a ship, and Michael's initials twisted around his, and the shimmer of light in the ship that will glow under the right light.

[littleorphanalien]

Michael shifts his other hand to stroke Alex's brow and hair back, doing it steadily when it seems to keep him almost calm and he wants to keep him like that, cautious and steady. "Any tips on what you might want? Super appreciated," he confesses.

Watching Alex lift his sleeve, his mouth goes dry as he stares at it, not sure he has the actual words to explain how much he feels about that tattoo. "Alex," he croaks, overwhelmed with emotion. "Fuck," he manages. "It's really fucking beautiful."

Is it worth the trip to the hospital? That part, he's not sure.

"Hey," he says. "How do we make me your emergency contact, while we're here? And vice versa, even if you better never fucking let me come to a hospital," he warns.

[unendurable]

"Mmmmm, glad you like it," he sighs, smiling at that touch, loving the tender way that Michael touches him, the way he's caring for him. Frowning though as Michael looks at the tattoo, realizing something.

Forcing his eyes open then, shifting to try and clutch at Michael. "You came here. For me. You came to this place." He's wide eyed then, looking stoned as all Hell as he stares at Michael.

"You love me so much," he says with a sigh, leaning in to kiss him tenderly. "You make me feel special," he whispers. "We'll tell the records department here, and put an in case of emergency into our phones, and report it to work, and ... whatever else we have to do," he says with a nod. Wincing as that makes him dizzy. "This is why I don't take pain pills.

[littleorphanalien]

Michael keeps doing it, because it's keeping his mind off the other thing, which Alex has to go and bring up. His jaw is tight and he nods his head, knowing that he doesn't feel great about it, and every announcement or update isn't helping.

"I'd go to a dozen hospitals for you," he vows. "But if the positions were reversed, I'd expect you to make sure the ambulance had an accident before they ran a single test on me," he insists.

That stoned look on Alex's face, though? God, it's the sweetest, funniest, most romantic thing he's ever seen. "Why, because they make you so sweet?" he teases, kissing him back, stroking Alex's hair back and taking his temperature at the same time. "I need to be your contact, for this kind of thing. I need to be there for you."

[unendurable]

"I swear," he says, hissing on the S a bit as his body doesn't quite respond as it should due to the medication. Like that wide eyed look as he nods at Michael. "I promise I'll keep you safe, Michael. I won't let any hurt you."

He pauses, considering that and then gasps slightly. "I can install an app on your phone and it would just take you holding down on the symbol for the app to send me a message that you need me there like now, and so if they get you in an ambulance you can let me know. And a tracker that maybe I can install a gps to work even if the phone is off."

Because while he looks a bit dizzy as he talks about it, he has plans now. To protect them both.

He snorts at that comment about being sweet, leaning in close to him. "I hate how I feel," he admits with a soft, petulant sound. "And we'll make sure it's on my records. Fuck, it should have been because of therapy but I don't think I even thought about it,' he admits. "Just ignored that since the military defaulted to Jesse."

[littleorphanalien]

He's so fucking adorable and he doesn't even know. Michael tries to hide his grin by ducking his head down, sliding his fingers over Alex's hand as he stares at him with an overly fond, besotted smile on his face. It's allowed, because Alex is so drugged that it's not like he's going to notice.

"That sounds real smart," he praises. "And when you're not stoned anymore, I'm even gonna let you do it." He's so relieved to hear that Alex is safe that he's not even thinking about what put him here.

Which, he really should.

"We'll do it before we leave. But for now, how about you tell me why you're not eating? Do I gotta set alarms on my phone for that?"

[unendurable]

Alex shifts and wriggles closer to Michael, making a face and realizing his prosthetic is off. "I want my leg back," he mutters, nose wrinkling as he brushes Michael's curls back from his face, kissing his temple. Mostly his temple. Kind of the corner of his eye.

"I hate these things. Nothing feels right. They kept trying to get me to take them in the hospital, to self administer morphine, and I wouldn't. Fuck that," he sighs, flopping back on his pillow and groaning. "Hate being dizzy."

He turns his head, frowning at Michael. "It was one day. I just had to so much to do and not enough time and so I figured I could just wait until dinner. I meant to snack but..." He shrugs. "I got too busy."

[littleorphanalien]

Michael's mouth forms a soft and round 'oh' because he knows what Alex means, he can see the prosthetic, but he also knows that he could be speaking from a completely different place. Michael cups Alex's cheek and presses his lips to his temple, brushing kiss after kiss there.

"If I were Max," he gets out hoarsely, "I'd use every last ounce of my power to see if I could grow it back." He leaves him with a last kiss to his forehead, but heads to the foot of the bed to lift up the sock and the prosthetic, lifting the sheet and sitting on the other side of the bed to start helping him back into it.

And yeah, fuck, Alex is still painfully sweet like this.

"So what I'm hearing is that I'm stashing granola bars at the front desk for the both of us?" he interprets. "Seeing as going out for lunch every day costs a lot of money." And he's still got some old habits that are hard to break when it comes to spending.

[unendurable]

"Miiiiichael," he whines, his face screwing up when he realizes what he said that made Michael talk like this about healing his leg. "If you were Max I wouldn't think you were sexy," he points out as if that is the point of this and he meant literally Max. "I like you as you, and I need you," he says with a sigh, closing his eyes.

"I like how you are with my leg," he admits. "I never thought I'd be with someone after I lost it. Someone that would see me without it, and touch my leg, and be there for me. I nearly cried that first time in the trailer when you caressed it," he murmurs, almost drifting out as he's honest about how he feels.

"Maaaaybe might be good. I just... I don't know how much tie I have here, and I want to do everything I can while I'm here," he admits. "For us."

[littleorphanalien]

Michael huffs out his laugh, coughing to try and hide the fact that he's laughing at Alex. He gives him a fond look as he slides the sock on, leaning up his body to press a very rewarding kiss to his lips because Not-Max is the best compliment he gets, some days.

He's about to open his mouth and tease Alex about the time in the trailer, but then Alex has to go and basically knock him down by talking about how much time they have here, and what he wants to do for them.

"Alex," he gets out, struggling. "Why do you think that it's gotta be contained to our time here? When we go back, if we go back, we're gonna try, aren't we?"

[unendurable]

Arching up into that kiss, smiling dreamily. "Definitely glad you're not Max," he sighs, staring at Michael like he's seeing him for the first time, positively lost in him. "I'm so lucky you love me," he says, touching Michael's lips with the tip of one finger.

"I want to!" He nods eagerly then, for a moment before making a face. "Michael, please, believe me. I'm just so scared. If we go back to that moment, without a month here, would you forgive me for everything that happened? Would it be okay? You wouldn't hate me every time you look at me because of what you lost because of me?"

[littleorphanalien]

"I'm glad I'm not Max everyday," Michael quips with a shake of his head, laughing when only one of his fingers gets a kiss. He slides back to finish with the sock, working on the socket and the other pieces of the prosthetic, gently stroking his palm over Alex's leg as he does.

"I..." If he didn't have months of being a friend with Alex, what would he do? "I think it'd be hard, not remembering this, but I still loved you," he says. "No matter what bullshit happened, no matter how angry or hurt I got with you, I still loved you. It just kept hurting. We'd just need to figure out a way for me to understand how good it can be, if we work past that."

[unendurable]

Alex sighs, laying back and enjoying how that feels, how amazing it is to him that anyone is doing this for him. "You're too good to me, Michael,' he murmurs softly, a bit pouty as he listens to Michael's answer.

He shifts, propping himself up on his elbows to look at Michael.

"That drive back? I was thinking about how bad I had fucked up. Not just about Caulfield but with you. About why I ran. About why I did a lot of things." His words aren't clearer though his thoughts are, even if he's a bit slow, hesitating.

"And I realized that no matter how afraid I was, in the end what I said there is the truth. You are my family, Michael, and I was trying to find the words to tell you that it wasn't just trying to get you out of there but it was the truth. The realization you were going to die and I'd never see you again and I would rather risk Jesse trying to kill me than to walk away from you again."